Sadly there is no chance of a software update allowing a permanent switch off. All new cars sold from July 2024 onwards legally have to have these features enabled everytime you start the car thanks to the EU GSR2 regulations.
I now have a routine of disabling stop/start, holding down the lane departure button for 3 seconds and going into the assist menu to disable the speed warning every time I start driving which ironically is a bit distracting.
